I am almost there

My name is Aaron, I wear lipgloss because "I am worth it"

On tuesday my fav. canadian brokeback couture faggot ladiboi with a huge ass of attitude will arrive. N probably the only person that got 90 albums on his Facebook. There is more anticipation than ever and I am sure that after a week I will try to drown him in the pool downstairs, but until than I must admit that there hasn't been this much happiness going on since Christmas -98 when I got a vintage LV bag as gift.

Everyone has three lives: a public life, a private life, and a secret life. I was supp. to go for a vernissage at 3pm today, instead I woke up at 1pm and realized that Carol was during laundry in the kitchen. WTF, it´s Saturday. I got up and opened up my closet to choose a dress for the art opening, I stood infront of the mirror looking at my naked body and thought that today was a "bad body day" and went back to sleep some more. At 2pm I sent a text to Cliff saying that I m too hungovered to sip champagne with pretentious artfags. At 4pm I was sipping Shiraz in the livingroom and thinking to myself why that Swedish model I met last night was so short. After 30min of facebooking I could still not shake away my doubts about the short male model so I send Angie a text saying "did u bang that Italian 20 year old last night? N by the way r u sure that C. is a model...isn´t he like 1.77?" That´s how pathetic my weekends has become. Tomo I will spend the whole afternoon by the pool in my non-existing bikini reading Milton Friedman...yeah right.

just like cricket

Mixing Mira Sorvino and Mariah Carey, just like mixing parsley with ice cream and you get the movie Wise Girls. The movie was a total flop but I digg the script:
Raychel: What are you on?
Meg: What am I on? It's just two glasses of wine and a couple of valium. You want some?
Raychel: Valium? Who the fuck takes valium anymore?

well, I do. I take loads of them and I love it. It's just like Robin Williams once said about baseball on valium is cricket. Life on valium is better, and life on valium with wine is the best. What I really wanted to tell you guys is that this morning I woke up by a email on my phone, it was from A.T(if u r reading u know who u r u small cock), a french guy I got physical with a couple times while back in uni. in Stockholm. Anyways, we kept contact and when I went to Paris he came to see me and I guess that we are good friends that used to fuck. There you go. But the thing is that he is getting married...not with his girlfriend for 6 years but with some random chick he "got to know for 4 month ago and started to seduce for 2 month ago". So I was laying in my bed still not sure if I am sleeping or awake...having a panic attack. This is the last guy on the motherfucking planet that will get married and especially not with some girl he just met. The whole morning I was feeling sick, I almost yacked in the taxi. And for your information splashing lukewarm water into your face does not help against panic attacks.

Why is everyone suddently getting married, what happened with "I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic."?

I never felt so lonely before.

review

AJs amigos

AJs mums "garden", its actually a flower plant, they export flowers or something

I am tired, not because of the jet lag but because of the amount of alocohol I consumed. Me and AJ "found" a bottle of Veuve in the fridge, I think he got it on his birthday before we left for Europe. Anyways, we drank it, all of it. And now I can't write anything but upload stupid pictures from the trip. Enjoy

landed

Got back last night from a 23h trip, Air France sucks big cock...the food is poor and the stewardness butchy...or was it bitchy? Anyways, flying in business class is the only way to fly, in economy class you get treated as frickin animals. I am pretty drained out BUT will update you guys on more juicy details tomo. Now I need to take a valium and get some sleep. laterssss

Take care, if I don´t see you this Easter. And everyone wears Gant in Madeira

I just read my last input and I apoligize for any misspellings, blame it on the wine.

Yesterday we went for lunch at a friends place, I ate lamb with rice, potatoes,bread and sweet potatoes...yes, we love carbs here. Before the lamb I had 8 different cheese from the region and wine LOADS of wine. Than 3 different kind of dessert and 6different kind of apertif. I just discovered my asian glow. And this is how it is foodwise, everyday.

Less than one week left here and things are going very slooooooow,I liiiike it. We wake up around 10am, have breakfast and than bum around the island in our car. Have a coffee here and than a drink at some local bar where alcohol is served 9am in the morning. And occasionally we have a meaningless dicussion about which color is more masculine; blue or black. Until some amigos calls us and wants to meet up with at the northcoast and grill some fish, more drinks and smoke...there is always someone supplying...no worries. After the dinner(at 11pm) we head down to the local bar where the young people look like they just stepped out of a sleepy college movie from the 80s. The Madeira fashioncouncil is predecting the come-back of the "Canadian tuxedo" next spring. Anyways, we have a couple of punchas(very strong sugarcane rum with honey and lemon) out on the street standing, noone seems like to sit here. Maybe it is some STD-prevention method I don't know about.

On our way down to the bar last night we passed by a cafe where a small girl that was obviously fat and also big boned with glasses thick like hell stood. Alright, she was like 5 years old and extremly ugly, actually more retarded look. Anyways, me and AJ cracked up when we saw her because our brain is the size of a green pea right now. Antonio(AJs half danish friend) looks back at the little monster and goes - " But No Gant". Sorry, I know all of you probably don´t find this funny because your brain is not the size of a pea. But I just died in laughs there on a back street of a small coastal town on Madeira, everything I needed was a fat kid with bad eyesight and a portuguese/danish dude that talks like Borat.

Happy Easter filha de putta! (mothafucka in portuguese)

no ingels por favore u faggot

sooooo, here I am. In Portugal, after more than 24h travelling. Actually I got here on Thursday eve, since than I have only been sitting in JBs. car baking and drinking. Ohhh yes, let's not forget EATING. I am for the moment eating a cheesecake the size of Jenna Jamesons leftboob. AJs friends is a gang, a fricking GANG. Not the kind with butterfly knifes and crack between their fingernails...but a group of men in their 30's with Polo Sport pullovers and beige gant chinos. And let's not forget the charming HICKING SHOES! WTF, imagine a bunch of frat boys...let's say from George Town, like in a Abercrombie Ad but instead of white sneakers, suede driving shoe or those ugly granny sailing slip-ins, instead they are all in brown Timberland hiking boots!!!

...and they all sound like Borat when they try to speak english. Oh yeah, I need to learn portuguese, no one fucking cares about speaking english and in the beg. I wouldn't notice how sadI am because I would have been baking the whole morning in JB aka burbies car. But now I notice, do u fucking hear me, I NOTICED how stupido I am. Standing in a room listening and laughing at stuff I have no idea about.I guess thats what we called a "language-barrier". That must been the most gay word this week.

We had a birthday brunch thing for AJ today, and the gang was there ofcourse...sporting their Paul&Shark sweaters and brown hiking shoes. The event started officially at 2pm and the first guest arrived at 3pm, read "culture-barrier".
AJ got Massimo Dutti clothes in gifts and some CD.