you come, I go.

I hold with whose who favor fire.
Your heart is made of ice.
Mine is pounding with fire.

hakuna matata

Im going to tell my Dad that I'm pregnant. n that I think the father is someone on the Nigerian football team that was in town last month, but it is hard to say who exactly. N than tell him that since I started smoking crack, I have been slutting it away. Plus that i am hoping my gonorrhea doesn't complicate the pregnancy. and than, oh yeah, I have a tattoo.

its just ink.

i got inked today

philippe left today after spending 5 days in sthlm with me. that boy is pure happiness and he eats everything i cook. saturday it got more dekadent than i wanted, we concluded that all my friends are fucking awsome. everything was perfect besides i got bitch slapped by juanes, he screamed "what do you want from me" and I reminded him about the skeletons in the closet. Our last guest left 9am in the morning and Philippe passed out on the sofa with his super tight swedish cheap monday jeans on. the next morning he tried to rape me in my bed, due to the difficulty of taking off his highness tight swedish trousers and also the fact that we were so fucking hang over, he felt asleep next to me with me screaming at him to not move so much.

oh yeah today i inked.

tomo the ali g of geneva will be visiting me!

i told him to leave his private banking attitude and pretty shoes home and come in his gansta stuff cause we gonna steal bikes and spit on small kids.

my flat looks like if a fucking hippie atomic bomb exploded here. i dont utilize my walls, im a on the floor girl. i like my lipsticks, food, ciggarettes and men on the floor.

tonight la boheme with juanes.

laters suckers.

"I don't give a shit about sleeping, Leon. I want love, or death. That's it. "

You -"yesterday i watched LEon again. and i still cannot expalin why, Mathilda makes me think about u, all the time"
Me - "cause she likes guns"
You -"maybe the age gap with Reno..."
Me -"and she doesnt like to sleep."
You -"maybe the small boobs..."
Me - "must been the boobs than!"

77 is better than 69 cause you get 8 more

here you go M

oh hell just frooze over

juan just told me that his folks might be a vivid reader of my blog

guess if i need another drink now....fuckaduck. this is not parent friendly.

anyways, P & E if you two are reading this, please accept my apology for being a wildchild with no notion about how to look like a lady. i cant stop writing the way i do so please bear with me. btw it would be really nice to have dinner with u two before my departure to shanghai, i especially enjoy Ps barbequed ginger ribs. over n out. i love you all

Je suis venu te dire que je m'en vais...

I write cause if I dont´t I think all the stories in my life will break my heart. Serge is singing in the background and nothing seems to calm my soul. I told Juan to go n hustle somewhere else today. He doesnt know about it but Im worried about him, he is back with his old on and off gf. She provides him with intimacy and pills. It´s like Nancy and Sid, without any talent for drama and music. Actually Juan got talent, he is just too numbed to realize it. I wanna tell him yo leave this place called home, home is destructive.

My second cousin commited suicide, he didn´t leave a note. Just a father and us others to sob. I am so angry with him, one permanent solution for a temporary problem. I was not close to him and now I´ll never be. I don´t know how to deal with grief. Nicotine and Caffeine can solve most of my pains, but this one I don´t know. I feel nothing again. Im staring at the almost empty scotch bottle. Maybe I will take a nap.

Monsieur keeps contacting me although Im million miles away. Communication and techonology will one day destroy my life. Actually it has already. He gives me all the happiness in the world but idiots are everywhere. He tells me I arrived too late and I tell him timing is everything and I think he arrived at the perfect time. Double my age, double the pain, double the pleasure. I forbid him to call me the princess. Princess wait for her prince and wonders what the future has for her. I dont wait and I dont wonder. He is everything I wants in a man and everything I hate about a man.

home sweet home!!!!

jetlag n alcohol is a devine and cheap combo.

Small girls grows up to be ladies, small boys grows up to be big boys.

I have left my grandma after 6 days of food stuffing and is now in the city of my father. He stills keeps his girlfriend out of our house everytime Im visiting, makes me feel like his young mistress. I've tried to invite her numerous times for drinks, tea, artesian water or whatever that will make her happy. It is becoming a lil bit rude for my taste, nothing like my mums bf that act like my personal driver and refers to my mother as "your sis". My dysfunctional family in a box. No wonder I got fatal taste in men.

Monsieur took a flight to GZ to spend his last wknd as a uneligible bachelor with moi, isnt that swell. Women needs a reason to have sex, men needs a place. I just need someone that is bad for me and voila Im butt naked in no time. He tells me that I'm cold and when I do start to touch him he tells me to be careful not to fall in love. This one I got it under control, sex relieves tension while love causes it. I told him about this young boy that hollowed my heart out and monsieur looks at me with those familiar eyes and asks me what kind of man I'll marry. "I think I'll marry someone that I don't like that much". Monsieur got nothing to loose and althought I dont have a heart I'm giving him my most precious item - time.

Married men doesnt cheat because they want sex, they cheat cause they are boys with a salary and this time they want something more grande - intimacy. I am so over-hugged this wknd I broke down with a heat stroke exactly 1 h after I sent off monsiur. Diagnose: Too much intimacy n too lil action. My real dad took care of me while the other one kept texting me about how he can still smell me on his shirt.

This is really bad and I'm looking forward going back home for 2 weeks. Time difference will end this. Im so hopeless.

if it has tires or testicles, I´m going to have trouble with it

was on the phone with my oppa last night while grandma was using her new digital scale to weight every single thing she could find in her house. oppa is removing his stitches off his head today and maybe once his wound is healed our bond will also take a break. Monsieur and I is talking way too much these days, I tell him to go n spend his last week as a bachelor out in the street and not being on the phone with me. he tells me that he should have met me for 20 yrs ago, i remind him that 20 yrs ago I was 8. i told E-type earlier today that I think married men are cute, i get the best of them and their wives get the rest.

exactly one year ago i was someone that believed in the silly thing called love but a meaningless creature took all my belief away. tomo that same guy is keeping his promise and flying off to sweden. promises are like babies, easy to make, hard to deliver. in this case he is delivering it way too late. i got no more feelings for him nor others. i feel nothing.

with love from yasikinz.tumblr.com

Le Big Mac

Dear readers, I took the freedom to exercise some vulgarity last night. Thaifood with the Lo(c)ksmith and we concluded that we always over orders and end up looking like two pigs. Last eve was especially notorious cause its apparently some kind of soft-tofu chinese valentines day, there were frickin rose petals on our table and me in my uniqlo sweatpants with lard stains. We keep saying "im so fucking hungry" every second minute the food doesnt arrive. actually im lying, we kept saying that even when the dishes started to show up at our table with the exception that we added "this is so fucking good" and "shit, this is fucking great". After dinner I went back to get changed and went to say farewel/c u again/keep smelling my panties to some ppl. before heading to the Flat to shake my lambchops to Hed Kandi.

This morning I woke up with the worst headache ever since grad 6 when I thought skiing drunk is a great idea and hit my head on the slope. Brother Lo(c)ksmith never shows up to the Kandi party so I figured he was making love to his Genie in the bottle. She is his latest conquest and I think I like her and her pastell colored clothes. I wonder if he would be happy or mad if I tell him that I would totally do her if she was a hobby-lesbian like me.

It´s 4.38am and I just got off the phone with the monsieur, Im starting to realize that being dramtic doesnt decline with age. I think the only reason why I´m still enjoying him is because I get to live out my own PG version of Delta of Venus. I wonder what mother will say, problably something in the line with A bachelor needs inspiration to sleep with you darl but a married guy only needs an excuse, ride this one out, this one is made of glass n not the unshattered kind.

last night in shanghai

its going to be a very very calm night. i promise. :)

so im sitting on the floor in his colorless livingroom resting my head on the grey sofa while the gentleman is pouring me another vodka in his italian kitchen. it is exactly 321m between my house to his but he still insist on using his electric scooter to take me home, apparently when it breaks we get closer. so fucking hippie i think. so fucking convenient he thinks.

i sit there and keep smiling not because im naughty because he makes me nervous. there are two passports on the table, one is for me we casually jokes. if we were be running away i need to go home and put my panties on. the polish vodka taste like vanilla and my russian red lipstick is all over my face. he offers to dry my hair in his bedroom and i teach him how to make a french braid, he tells me i look like a virgin in my braid. i show him all the tricks i learned at my sunday servies and he tells me that im dangerous, i tell him im like a lamb. when he puts his hands around my neck i think all the lights went off in this city and my throat is so dry i chuck another glass of vodka. tu es beau moi non plus.

last night i dreamt about cheese, the hard one. jules tells me she might be over-fucked. i dont think that will ever happen to me.

brain damage

1. do not have dinner with married men alone
2. do not have drinks with married men alone
3. do not go to a married mans house alone
4. do not tell a married man that you are not wearing any underwear
5. do not do not during any circumstance kiss a married man

stop slutting banana. stop slutting