being raped by work

Me and angela went to buy toilet paper today cause apparently we are being overfed with fiber at work. This is the problem with getting premium breakfast at work. We talked about the weather and why Korean boys are so fucked up. Angela herself is a published novelist and is struggling with her second novel at this very moment. Super coolness. We concluded that I am being raped by work, in my bed, kitchen, on the metro, you name it. Im the Evernote whore.

Jens that sits opposite me works for our partner firm and he is stuck with reading American west coast mama blogs all day long. We spend a significant time on a Swedish satirical papa blog. Omfg swedes can be embarrassingly pretentious, sour dough, being a house hubby and how to recycle organic diapers made by Africa tribes. Just the words “ vintage baby fashion” makes me puke a lil bit in my mouth. Puking granola so to speak.

Thank god its Friday, so I can pretend I don’t have to work tomorrow.
Sayonara suckers. I hope my colleagues are out buying booz for the after-work that will start in exactly 49min.

i wake up n i go to work

played tennis with my koreans last night. i think i not only lost my healthy perspective about what a relationship should be in China, my nasty backhand is gone as well. my bff Norris in beijing made a playlist for me and right now n kci n jojo is playing the background, its swell to know that there is someone out there that takes his time to be mean to you. i wanna gossip about work but honestly there is not much juice there, besides that the breakfast we get is a-class, organic yes, we recycle, u bet! thats how pretentious we are.

my n me koreans were having a size-issue talk last night when H-J suddenly burst out n drop the line " i got a pretty small one". Dude, i totally under-estimated u, its not how deep the ocean is, its how well u rock the boat! his backhand is a killer btw.

my swedish mama n papa is out in the archipelago again n i m anticipating for them to come back so we can watch the Borgias together. its like Dallas mixed with medieval soft porn.


watching this with adults can be somewhat embarrassing.

Coup de foudre

And who would have thought that i finally would FEEL again. It´s been a while since a mere sight of a stranger could get my cheeks flushed. I know that I wet my pants alot randomly but oh boy what I have missed out on the hottest meat I ever have laid my eyes on. Totally jizz at the first signt! who would have thought that the finest asian guy would appear in stockholm on lidingöbana? This kjw look-a-like in red converse makes Rain looks like limp bread. N he got big feet WOW.

We got off at the same stop and I walked up to his back, just when I was about to say something irresponsibly ridiculous I reminded myself how once a true fuck at the first sight lead to a long fucking depressing mourning. So I kept walking. STUPID. As soon as I entered the house and Emma came to greet me she was like "why r u breathing so heavily" or should I say heavenly. Emma n Per made fun of me cause I told them that I am shy, me shy yeah right. ill never see a man as fine as You ever again but im grateful for the sparks that will eventually set my heart into flames in the future. no more south korean hot psychopath mess.

FUckaduck, yalle even u would have stripped naked n begged for a mercy fuck.

i feel like a teenager on sexoroids.

jet lag flag bag swag

no snuff, fag in the house.

i miss my homies in the hai

sthlm is cold

i had my first day at work today in the stockholm office n i stumbled into our posh office in the morning with more nerves than i possibly ever had before. maybe it is because i aged 5 yrs for the last 10 month or it was just the jetlag kicking in. im going to sip another glass of water n go to bed. i feel that im dying a lil bit in sweden. its like i close myself off.

just landed n is unpacking. was watching norweigan wood on the plane, big no no unless u want to look like someone that enjoys japanese soft porn in public.

christine: i miss u too! 언니 is watching ur sexy ass! btw. im a big fan of the adams apple as well. sometimes i ask a guy to drink water just to get myself wet.

martijin: moisturization. not to be confused with masturbation.

we came, we played, we made a fucking mess

landed in shanghai after a pretty smooth flight from grandmas and got back to a house w/o electricity...called the concierge n problem was fixed in 2min...love China. My new bff Norris and I took a cab ride to Korea town and went bogus in a BBQ restaurant where we acted like a couple from a korean drama - me feeding him the meat and he cleaning my teeth with a toothpick. Afterwards we went to a K-mart where we bought 12 lollipops and Dr You cookies. To put the end to our k-town experience we went to a digital driving range and behaved like total arseholes with our golf clubs. Met up with Carl that was dressed like a pimp from a chinese 2nd tier city and spent 6h watching semi-porn on Norris computer.

eehhh urk pfff

"the first one is for you and the second one is for me"



had lunch with my mums friends today, they were all asking me about why im still single. wtf do they mean with STILL. being 28 n not married here in motherland is like having cancer. incurable ones. after the lunch i went to muji to smell some japanese interior air, found this nice birch foodboard that reminded me of that time when I carved one for my ex kimchi. i wonder if he throw it in the fireplace yet. i was a romantic at that time. greek love letter on a wooden board is all i have to give, and blowjobs in the morning.

my korean B-boy asks me to call him and i strictly refuse to start a fire when i know ill get burned. so he called me from seoul yesterday. 80% of the conversation was me convincing him that he needs to take english class and other 20% was him telling me to improve my non-existent korean. yalle was sweet enough to tell me how to flirt in korean, the only problem is that most of the times the girl starts the sentence by moaning OPPA (big brother) and in my case Im noona (big sister)...yup i like them young. so we have decided that im officially a OSILF, not to be mixed with MILF. the best relationships are the ones when both are deaf.

nate calls me 5am and than text me n asks me if i mind dating a drunk. i dont mind drunks but i do mind dating one, or anybody for that matter. i cant believe how things has turned out for me and him. note im not writing "us".

im listening to love will tear us apart by nouvelle vague and it makes me wanna eat goat cheese with honey.

over n out

me and yalle concluded today that all her korean boys are out of military and all mine are in the mud eating shit. so she is going to help me to play the ultimate fan and send letters to the hottest man that ever came out of korea, Mr Kim Jae Wook. Package to be dispatched to this address 경기도 연천군 전곡읍 신답리 사서함 106-3호 2136-101부대
1중대 3소대 이병 김재욱 (우편번호 486-859) will include; swedish snuff, one pair of used undies with swedish flag on and lipstick scented letter with pink hearts on.


kjw shave more than just his face. He also exfoliate and moisturize. My kind of man!

notes from dads readingroom

got back to guangzhou from 2 days in hongkong. i was sick already last week in shanghai and today my body totally gave up on me. viv was doing alright in the kong, dumped me on sat night to go home n masturbate. itai dumped me on sat night to go home n fight with his squeeze. met up with bonbon for high tea n realized ive been a slut lately n maybe thats why i feel so tired.

i cant seem to produce anything besides mucus right now. i think i want to have some kids.

very very tired n sick n depressed

boy meet girl

hand in hand
that in hand
hand in that
that in that

i cant fight fate so i run

im in hk and i miss you. actually i hate you. but i miss you.