it was a hiatus. a forced one. i tried to place my feelings somewhere else, in a foreign place. it didn't work. my heart didn't want to grant my mind the peace. so I'm back here, furious but certain.

during lunch i asked Gabby why rehabs in china are full of expats. He took one look at my glass of wine and shook his head. I still havnt figured out what he meant but I am sure it has something to do with the burning sun or his burning nostrils. i told him that he is like a little brother to me and if he will avoid this bullshit. Later on same night an onion head tells me she is with Gabby. Life is too short to fold fitted sheets. Life is a straight line for him. Simple. 

The Woman realised that she is just a mashup of their ex girlfriends. Only a stand-in, a phantom foundation. She didn't know about the curse, about the men, about the women. The wind was blowing in her hair and she was obviously riding the scooter high as a kite. 

The truth is the more she loves him the more she needs to love. Her heart doesn't get full and locked away. She got so much love to give.

He doesn't know what is going on, he thinks about her. She knows exactly whats going, she thinks about him. The jury is still out. 

in my inbox today

i have been here before but never enough

i m back. maybe not for long but this city has awaken a part of me that has been hiding because of the fear of living. fear of life could be more mortal than death itself. its been another sunday afternoon spent in complete honesty. like the main character in a mediocre french movie. mingus is playing piano while life is being more surprising than ever. i could barely walk down the townhouse where peanut butter lives, its a clean and modern walkup in the west village. while we were on his rooftop my mind was somewhere in brooklyn, wondering if the band that im not seeing is good enough for you to considering working with them. the fake matisse u gave me make me smile. thank you for the thought. you dont impress me at all, you are entering my world on a golden unicorn. if i only knew there was so much to life, rich yet light.

when you turn down the robert downey jr look-a-like in shanghai and find urself another downey look-a-like in hk.

there are nine circles in hell

i almost puked this morning in the cab going back home so that i could show the office at 8.30am. i barely rmba how the fck i went from table no 1 n ended up at renminlu. apparently i went to the wrong compound. fapiao thinks that a psychotherapist can fix my lack of direction. i m color blind, not stupid. besides, if any of us had any sense of direction we wouldnt find us in this beautiful mess now. a gps wont save us at this moment. maybe a map, a map showing where the exit sign is. this is not an exit nor an entrance. its limbo. It's like going from nowhere to nowhere. time to raise the bar higher or lower.

on a post-it in his room

“Rather a moment of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special.”

live like you teach